I’m moving to France.
Post graduation has been one of the most trying times of my life. I feel like I’ve had several quarter life crises since walking across the stage on graduation day. I miss college and friends and honestly, I don’t feel ready to be an adult. I’ve realized that I don’t want the typical desk job or a 9-to-5. I’ve been thinking a lot the past few months about complacency and I’m terrified to live a life where I just chase money, pay bills and don’t do much of anything else. I get antsy thinking about spending the rest of my life sitting at a desk for 40 hours a week. I feel like I’ve been duped. Growing up, we were always told in school that life really begins after you finish college. But, that’s not true. Life was happening before I finished college and I hope it keeps happening.
This summer I’ve had the opportunity to do a fellowship at a newspaper under the Gannett Co./USA Today Network. It’s been an awesome opportunity and I’ve gotten to do things I never thought I would have the chance to do and expand my experiences in music journalism. I’ve loved it. But it’s also made me realize that I need to take some time off. So when I got an email from the French Embassy a couple of weeks ago, I immediately knew what I had to do.
I got accepted into TAPIF (Teaching Assistants Program In France) to teach English at the middle/high school level in the Nice region of France after being waitlisted earlier this year. I was so happy to find out that I’d been accepted and with no concrete plans for work after I finished my fellowship, I jumped at the chance.
I’d been applying to jobs like a madwoman and was scared that I’d have nothing to do after my fellowship ended because it seemed like every day there was a new rejection letter from a company waiting to disappoint me in my inbox. In hindsight, I truly believe God was closing those doors for me because I probably would’ve picked a job over France before. He knew that and was bringing His much more perfect plan into fruition. I’ll be in France for 8 months. While I’m there I’ll also be freelancing a bit.
So I guess you could say that I’ll be taking a gap year before adulthood or something like that?
I don’t know if that’s exactly what I want to call it, but we’re always so in a rush to grow up and work in the U.S. and I think I’ve done too much of that. The idea of taking a gap year before college here is almost frowned upon and that’s problematic. So maybe this is the gap year I never got to take. I just want time to slow down and figure out who I am, what my purpose is, refocus a bit and rest.
I know this is going to be one of the most challenging experiences of my life, but I’m up for the challenge. I’m well aware of the threats of terrorism that exist in France today and my heart is aching for the people of Nice right now. But we can’t stop taking risks and living because of evil people or fear.
God doesn’t call the equipped. He equips the called.